is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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