Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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