Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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