is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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