I need help removing her.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Randomize
