bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
