New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize
