Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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