Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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