end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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