Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
