After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
jump out the window naked night went bad
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize
