she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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