so that wasnt chicken after all
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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