So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
