Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize