took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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