My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
