you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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