Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Randomize
