Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
