If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Randomize
