he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Send help, water and tortillas.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
