four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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