Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
