so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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