honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
