My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
