What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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