We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
