I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
