are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
