My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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