pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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