My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
