Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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