I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Randomize
