how hairy? two words: wookie tits
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
