So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
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