That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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