yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
