The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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