Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
