I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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