Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Randomize