You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
