I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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