think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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