i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
