VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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